Quick Start – Part 5

Now for Negotiating with the sellers….

First step is Building Rapport…

So how you connect with the seller especially if you’re shy or introverted?

First look as good as you can. Business Dress.

I think that you don’t need to look like a banker but not looking like a slob either is important.
a. Business hair cut
b. pressed button down shirt, white or white or blue
c. Gray slacks nice ones
d. Really good business shoes, wingtips
e. Navy blue blazer

Why bother to look like a business person?

Well if you have no deals, I think the “visual” will give you respect from sellers, and you want to close on the first visit, and you don’t want to waste your time, you had better put a lot of effort into how you look.

For women, business suit, white blouse, or red blouse or blue blouse.

Look like a banker or financial planner.


a. Have a briefcase for God’s sake.

Look like a professional business person.

Go to Marshall’s a T.J. Maxx and buy a nice one.

b. Stationary:

have lots of black pens, blue pens, red pens, felt tip markers, yellow pads, presentation folders, business cards, blank letter of intent forms, presentation sales book, etc.

c. A note about your car:

if you’re poor and you have very little money and you have a crappy car, parked it down the street and walked two minutes to the house.

d. Thank you notes:

there are few business tools more powerful than a simple thank you note with a business card. Stamp, with an ink address stamped on the back for return address, and a note that says something like,

“Thank you so much for investing little bit of time with me, and I’m certain of the ideas we talked about regarding your house situation will definitely help solve the problem you’re trying to solve.

Here’s an extra business card, and please scotch tape it to the refrigerator so you can find my number easily.

Best wishes,

Brian Gibbons
Innovative Property Solutions LLC

Now that we have the “image issue” out of the way we can work on the language.

The language of building rapport

How do you connect with the seller?
How would you feel that there was some “expert investor” coming over to your house?

Talking about financial issues in real estate?

How cautious would you be as a seller?
How guarded would you be as a seller?

So you must take 5 to 10 to 15 minutes to build rapport.

You must establish a connection.

Many people don’t know how to do that.

Here’s how to do it.

1. Ask the seller questions about himself or herself

You need to build bridges of common ground.

People like people that have things in common with themselves. They’re more comfortable with people that have similar interests and similar activities. Think about your activities that you’re involved with.

You want to draw the seller out to talk about themselves.

Dale Carnegie wrote “how to win friends and influence people” wrote about behavior of people.

People like to do business with people that they like and they trust.

People like you and trust you if they have more things in common.

Draw the seller out of their shell.

Get him or her talking about himself or herself whenever possible.

As an example think of yourself walking into a house.

You – hey of these your kids? (You point to a photo on the end table in the foyer)

Seller – yes those are my kids, John, my oldest. Susie there in the middle. And Luke my youngest.

You – How old are they now?

Seller – John’s 24, Susie’s 18 and Luke is 15

You – oh I have two children (bring out picture in your wallet) theres David 12 and Kelly 10. (building a bridge, creating commonality.)  So, does it get any easier when the get into their 20s ? (big smile)

Seller – it sure does. You know I always thought it was just really important to remember that we were teenagers wants to.  And we survived it!  But looking back, I’m not sure my parents survived my teen years (notice seller is loosening up to you)

You – I know exactly what you mean. I think I was probably the toughest of the bunch for my parents to raise (building a bridge). What is your oldest doing now?

Seller – he’s married with a child on the way. He lives in Boston and works for an engineering company out there.

You – Wow! You’re going to have a grandchild! That must be so exciting for you! How much longer until the due date?


You get the idea, some people might call the “Small talk”,

I call it the glue that helps me build rapport, and allows people to like and trust me quickly.

What you say if you’re shy or you were brought up in a non-people house, where people didn’t chitchat much?

Here are some ideas…

1) Where did you grow up?
2) Do you have any kids?
3) How old are they?
4) What is it that you do for a living?
5) How did you get started in that career?
6) What do you like to do for fun?

WARNING – just spent too much time building rapport, you are there to get a job done and go through all five steps properly.

There comes a point where some new investors find themselves wasting hours of their time making friends with people BUT not closing any sales.

There need to see if it’s a fit for you and your company fairly quickly use within 15 minutes. The second step, the upfront agreement is important to get into right after building rapport.

Another mistake is that you think that if step one is completed, you not to do any more about throughout the other four steps. You must build rapport as you go throughout the entire meeting with the seller.

I really want you to spend 5 to 15 minutes upfront building rapport before you move on to step two, but that doesn’t mean you’re done building rapport.

Throughout the negotiation you need to gauge your level of connection with the seller, and look for opportunities to deep in this connection. But you need to balance this need to maintain a connection, with your equally important need to move the conversation forward to its conclusion.

ABC, always be closing.


Pretty harsh sales training, but I love that scene!
The next post will be about setting up an upfront agreement or as I call it,

How to Avoid the Objection, Let Me Think It Over.